Thursday, December 27, 2007

Christmas Joy

He's the reason for the season.

Santa and his bag of loot, that is. Capitalism at its most glorious. And what a nice Christmas it was. As soon as I'm done typing here, I'm gonna go sit in my new leather rocking recliner. Ahhhhhh! On top of the loot collection feature of this holiday, we also made a batch of my mother's Christmas cookies. I hadn't made them in a decade or more and the activity of making them, the smell of them, and the taste of them evoked wonderful childhood Christmas feelings. Besides, it's about the only time I get to use the mace from the spice rack. Here's the recipe:

Rosie's Christmas Cookies

3 eggs
1-1/2 c. sugar (only "killer white" will do)
4 c. flour (sifted)
2 c. citron-type candied fruits (chopped fine)
1 c. nuts (chopped fine - I use the grater wheel on my mouli grater)
1 tsp. baking powder
1 tsp. cinnamon
1 tsp. cloves
1 tsp. allspice
1 tsp. mace

Cream eggs and sugar. Mix in everthing else. Roll into logs and refrigerate for an hour. Slice thin and dredge in sugar. Bake on a greased cookie sheet at 350 for about 12 minutes. Place in a sealed container with sliced apple. This is to soften them up to an edible state. Me, I never do this step.

This is a VERY dry batter. Don't be surprised. I got to use our fabulous red "professional-style" mixer this time, unlike my past efforts. Man! Was that ever so much easier than stirring that batter by hand. Hooray for technology! Oh, and, by the way, I can't *really* recommend these, in an abstract sense; they're kind of an acquired taste. Kinda like a cookie version of fruitcake. But I like 'em and that's good enuf for me!

One other amusing thing. There's a website which rates the readability of your blog. I plugged in my URL and got back the determination that it's:

ELEMENTARY SCHOOL

I didn't know my writing style and content were that approachable. How wonderful of me to be so inclusive. How broadminded of them to consider a blog which uses "fuck" at least once per post to be suitable for elementary school readers.

So, Merry Fucking Christmas, children! Welcome to Uncle Franko's blog where we tell the shit like it really is. Approved for your use by The Blog Readability Test algorithm and the half-wits who cobbled that stupid shit together while they were stoned on something truly mind-altering.

3 comments:

  1. Don't let Frank dissuade you from the Christmas cookies! They're pretty tasty. I recommend sweet candied fruit (e.g., pineapple) rather than the citrus rind kind.

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  2. You're insufficiently obfuscational to achieve an automated score created and designed, presumably, to calculate primarily the length of vocabulary elements and of sentences.

    GOOD!!!

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  3. Hey, Sandra,

    Thanks for saying that; but I obtained that rating right after parts 1 and 2 of my "math rant" which even my most erudite friends panned as being desperately obscure, obtuse, abstract, esoteric and generally unreadable.

    That's ok. This blog is mostly for my own entertainment, anyway. As long as I amuse myself...

    ReplyDelete