Monday, October 27, 2008

Craig, Gillian, Effie, and Fergus bribe #2

Remember, Bribe #1 is still hanging out there; but now it's time for something completely different.

Zenma's sugary treat concept seems to be having some effect, so I'll amp things up with this offer. I'll make y'all a classic Southern treat which I haven't made in 15 years...

Red velvet cake

But wait, there's more. I'll do a Steel Magnolias and make it in the shape of an armadillo

When we cut into it, the grey "skin" (icing) will give way to that fabulous blood-red color and it'll look almost like we're actually butchering an armadillo! How cool is that? Fun, huh?

Still not convinced? Ok, howzabout if we throw in this fabulous offer... For a main course to devour before we cut into our red velvet armadillo cake, I'll pay homage to another movie and make a meatloaf shaped like an armadillo with cornflake scales a la the wonderful comedy Another Stakeout.

I couldn't find an actual image of that dish from the movie, so look at this substitue and imagine it being... ummm, meatier, and with cornflake scales, and, well, just meatier. Ok? Oh yeah, and as Rosie O'Donnell explains in the movie, it's not made from armadillo meat. It's just regular meatloaf *shaped* like an armadillo. Ok?

How can you resist a double-dose-of-armadillo weekend? This is a limited-time offer, so ACT NOW! Operators are standing by.


  1. I'll come visit for that cake and that meatloaf. I like the bloody insides. I'll come visit without the cake and the meatloaf, but not soon. In May? In early June? That kind of soon...

  2. I'm not Fergus nor am I Effie, though, so maybe there aren't those kinds of bribes on offer for the non-Fergus and non-Effie folk.

  3. Could I laugh any harder?? You rock Frank. How could we resist? How can we not be coming? All I can say is it is definitely on our books to swoop (the relatively short distance) down to your place for a tete a tete with yous and yours before the holiday season gets truly rolling, so perhaps you could save the cake/meatloaf combo (and the booze!) for that helicopter ride?
    Huge hugs!

  4. Schuyler, see the email I sent you. I will happily prepare any kinda foodstuffs y'all want when you visit! Hooray!

    G, ignore the snide comment I just left at your blog before reading this. (wink!) YES! Come anytime and I will prepare anything ya'll want. I know there hasta be some jambalaya for the Craigster but everything else is open! Ever had turducken? Now, that's a farce!

  5. Maybe you can bring an armadillo or two down to non-con to cheer me up. I'm feeling a little sad now for some strange reason.

  6. Mary,

    Actually I was thinking about making crab mousse, shaping it like an armadillo and using crackers as scales/armor. Maybe I actually will try to do that.

    We can all try to cheer each other up this weekend. I intend to drink heavily. See y'all soon.

  7. Wow. Look at that! I'm too sleepy to come up with the appropriate superlatives. So I will stumble off and dream of armadillo cake ...